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Throughout the years, I’ve had plenty of blogging false starts. I’ll feel inspired for a few days and then the posts will dwindle. The timeline doesn’t lie, I’ve been doing this all the way back to 2001. I’ve pulled a backlog of old and embarrassing content in from old online services and accounts. I still need to go through it all and correct broken links, etc. but that’s another project for another day. I’m not quite sure why I’ve always been consistently inconsistent with my blogging; maybe it’s that my ADD kicks in or that I really didn’t feel that I have anything interesting to blog about, but that’s far from the truth. I really do have plenty to write about – whether or not I have an audience that’s willing to listen, that’s another story.

Right now though, I’m not worried about having hundreds of readers a day, or thousands of twitter followers. The only number that I’m concerned with is, “1”. I know that doesn’t seem like much, after all, one is the loneliest number. In my book, one isn’t the loneliest number. Zero is.

I’m always one heartbeat away from zero – we all are. I’ll go into some history and details in future posts, but for now just know this…

I’m thirty-four years old, and living with congestive heart failure.
As of today, I’m one heartbeat away from zero. Carpe Mortem.

I know that’s heavy for most, but I also know that it can always be worse. My heart just doesn’t pump as efficiently as most peoples’. My heart is currently 33% efficient. The average persons’ heart is about 55-70% efficient. Tomorrow I’m taking the first of what will be many steps in a long journey to help improve things. I’ve already completely turned my diet around (more on that in a future post), I’ve also started monitoring my sodium and liquid intake like a hawk (again, more on that in a future post) and I’m on a pretty good medicine regimen (again, more on that later).

But that’s all later. Tomorrow, I’m getting an Implantable Cardioverter Defibrillator (ICD) implanted in my chest. The idea of the ICD isn’t to help improve the efficiency of my heart, it’s to stand guard silently like a Jedi Ninja Warrior waiting to strike and jumpstart my heart if my loneliest number becomes zero. Ideally, then the beat goes on…

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